It's a new year. 2007 can be the best relationship year of your life--if you decide right now that it will be. One way to help insure that it will be is to commit to giving some thought and energy to keeping the passion alive in your relationship or marriage. This can be challenging, but it’s not impossible. It just takes some attention and focus. The day-to-day routine can actually build intimacy, rather than destroy it, if we make time to be intimate and giving with our partner every day. It’s a choice, like the choice of allowing your partner’s idiosyncrasies to make him or her more endearing to you rather than drive you crazy. Following are just a few of the things you can do to keep the fire burning between you and your long-term love:
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”I want you to get swept away. I want you to
levitate. I want you to sing with rapture, dance like a
dervish!" ~From the movie Meet Joe Black/b>
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Remember to appreciate and savor the little
pleasures, the bonuses of living together. Take time
each day to connect intimately with your partner:
Deeply embrace and gaze into each other’s eyes
lovingly, feeling each other’s energy. This can lead
to sex or not, depending on your mood.
Drift off in one another’s arms; it’s deeply
satisfying. Even if you can’t actually sleep that way,
you can spend 10 minutes or so embracing before
moving apart to sleep. Then when you wake up,
savor that time also, linger to spoon or embrace just
a few more delicious moments before getting
up.
Spend some time together remembering
how your relationship began, those first glances,
dates, kisses—how you fell in love. Revisit some of
places where you had your “firsts:” first kiss, first
date, initial attraction. This keeps those feelings of
romantic love fresh and builds new positive memories
as well.
Have new and exciting experiences as often
as you can. When you stay excited about exploring
and experiencing life together, you stay more excited
about each other, too. So travel together, skinny
dip, kayak, hike in the forest. Even small changes
from your regular routine, such as going to a new
restaurant or reading poetry together, can help
rekindle the passion.
Take a sacred sex workshop together or buy a
book on the topic and practice some of the
techniques together. Spicing things up in the
bedroom can keep the sexual energy between you
alive.
Once a year do a retreat or a workshop
together, something that will nurture your souls and
bring you closer.
Keep the energetic polarity between you.
Women, worship the maleness of your partner, and
men, worship the femaleness of your goddess
woman. Women, learn to relax into your feminine
essence and draw your man into your deliciousness.
Then, let your man ravish you with his masculine
energy.
Though some people believe that living together
kills the romance, seeing someone only for dating and
sleepovers in a relationship that’s never going to
culminate in living together or marriage can lack deep
intimacy. It has a sense of unreality about it. It’s
like being on vacation all the time. It sounds great
but for most of us, it would get boring and shallow
after a while. The real magic of a relationship is in
the intimacy, and intimacy is built by sharing the
good times and the bad, being there with each other
everyday, experiencing the beautiful and the
mundane, nurturing and loving each other through all
of it. So living together doesn’t have to kill the
romance; just put a little work—or play—at keeping
the passion alive.
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Pamela Ramey-Tatum, M.A.,CTACC
Relationship Coach,
Workshop Facilitator
© 2006 by Pamela Ramey-Tatum
All rights and media reserved.
The content of the Awakening to Love ezines may be
forwarded in full without special permission provided
it is used for nonprofit purposes and full attribution
and copyright notice are given. For other publishing
purposes, please contact Pamela Ramey-Tatum.
Awakening to Love is published every other
Wednesday by Pamela Ramey-Tatum, Relationship
Coach, Empowering Love, Inc.
empowering men and women to manifest the
relationhip of their heart's desire.
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